Sep 7

Sep 7 On The Perfect Online Dating Profile for Lockdown Romance

It’s official, we’ve entered the Break-Up phase of COVID-19 romances. So if you’re looking to get back out there, let’s help you put your best foot forwards with the help of behavioural science.

Ah, love in the age of COVID. If you’ve ever thought to yourself I wonder if I should apply for a reality TV show like Love is Blind, well now is your chance to test-drive that thought. Meeting someone online, spending weeks or months getting to know them behind a screen, finally meeting up in isolation… only to find out there is no spark in person. Yep, that’s right people, we’ve entered the breakup phase of COVID-19.

Yes, dating is a little bit different now that we have social distancing restrictions, but life goes on. After you’re done mourning a romance that didn’t work out, are there nuggets of wisdom from behavioural science that can help you up your game and get back out there? Why, yes there are!

Dating App Profile Pictures: The Currency of Love

Swiping through the suitors on the online dating app is the moment when people are making quick judgements about the candidate’s level of attractiveness. According to researchers Janine Willis and Alexander Todorov, people can draw conclusions about the appearance of others in 1/10th of a second (or, more specifically, they find that the judgements people make about other people’s faces in 1/10th of a second correlate highly with judgements made without any time constraints at all – meaning the quick judgements we make stick). This, combined with how dating apps give you access to lots of faces to judge very quickly, creates an environment where how you present yourself through photos is of critical importance to getting access to more potential candidates.

So now that we know how important picking the right pictures of yourself are, what’s the best strategy?

You and Your Shadow

Behavioural Economics has a recommendation: known as the decoy effect.

You could boost the level of interest by others by simply posting a picture of yourself with someone who’s similar to you, but less attractive.

The decoy effect describes how the presence of an inferior option can influence our perception of the choices. By adding a less attractive option, by comparison, it makes the original choice look better.

Dan Ariely, the cool uncle of behavioural economics, tested out this decoy idea in the evaluation of attractiveness of faces. Using pictures of faces that (through previous tests he found) were approximately the same level of attractiveness, he selected a pair of faces (call them A and B) to show to the study participants at MIT. Using his Photoshop skills, he created slightly less attractive versions of faces A and B to create A- and B-.

In one condition, participants saw face A, face A- (the photoshopped version of face A), and face B.

In the other condition, participants saw face A, face B- (the photoshopped version of face B), and face B.

Results showed that the presence of a less-good version of either face A or face B pushed people to prefer face A or B respectively – 75% of the time. Having A- there made 75% of participants choose A, but having B- there made 75% of participants choose B.

Basically, we make decisions based on the context. Why? We likely have a hard time comparing what’s in front of us to all the faces we’ve ever seen. It’s much easier for us to evaluate something as attractive if we have something that is similar enough (but also slightly different!) to compare it to.

What does this mean for you?

Put a picture of yourself with a friend that is like you but less attractive*

*in your opinion. Probably don’t tell them you think this is about them.

BUT: put this as your second picture. Why? How will the suitors know which one is you if that’s your first picture?

Indeed, online dating site eHarmony suggests you start off with a headshot picture, where your face is clearly visible (i.e. no obstructed by a hat, sunglasses, or mask!!! Wearing sunglasses leads to 63% fewer messages and likes).

Other Judgements

We make snap judgements about all kinds of other things too. For example, qualities like competence, trustworthiness, and conscientiousness are all qualities that researchers have found we form judgements about in as fast as 1/10th of a second.

One of the characteristics we make judgements about is dominance. Dominance is related to masculinity, and when it comes to dominance, men and women are not judged equally. For example, women who are judged as masculine are evaluated negatively, whereas men would be evaluated positively.

Researchers have found that heads held confidently up in pictures, or pictures taken from a lower angle, lead to judgements of dominance, as well as the perception that the person in the picture is happy. This is a positive for men, and a less helpful to women. Conversely, heads that are bowed connote submission and other emotions like shame, guilt, or embarrassment. So be careful with that headshot!

Lastly, get a few pictures in there that signals your personality and likes. This is the expert advice from the dating sites. Do you like sports? Throw in a pic of you doing what you love. Is your cat the centre of your universe? It’s better they find out about this sooner rather than later, especially if one day you plan on asking the pinnacle question of romance - would you like to form a social bubble? Not if they are allergic to cats!

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To Selfie or Not?

To the ladies… let’s take a selfie! If you are a woman on a dating platform, consider having one of your pictures be a selfie. Women who post at least one selfie get 4% more messages. But this will backfire for the gentlemen! Gentlemen with selfies get 8% fewer messages.

Ladies, let’s take a selfie!
Gentlemen, not so much.

Minimum number of photos: 4. Research from dating site Zoosk found that, though the more photos the better, those with at least 4 get more messages and have longer conversations.

Don’t forget, all these pieces of advice work in reverse too – they are likely impacting how you make decisions too. So if it’s not working out for you out there, try taking a critical eye to how you judge other people on apps. Maybe you’re missing a diamond in the ruff.